I took the new direct Avanti train from Hartford to Euston, then the Eurostar to Paris. My hotel was a fair distance from the centre, so I took a bus to the centre. When I arrived at the hotel, I crashed out because I had moved home the day before.

The absurdity was not lost on me. I spent the next hour imagining it as a really funny comedy sketch - the ridiculous accusation, the france setting, the lanyard trap; all the makings of brilliant satire. This mental exercise actually elevated the experience rather than dampening it, and I continued onward with amusement rather than annoyance.

To get to my local railway station, I needed to get a bus. I ended up boarding the wrong bus and going the wrong way. I realised this quickly when the bus entered the motorway at high speed. As it's not my first rodeo of being on a motorway unexpectedly, I asked myself, and found I was going to Bondy. Eventually, I found myself at a local metro station, where I took the "tube". My valid pass wasn't working at the gate line, and the ticket office worker had to let me through, although she did shout "go" with some anger to convey her authority to let me in. Since I wanted to visit Napoleon's tomb, my first destination was Les Invalides. Seeing this tomb was amazing; it is built so you have to bow down to see it. It was glorious to see the tomb of such a strong military commander. Upon exiting, I saw the Eiffel Tower in the distance, so I walked towards it and eventually arrived. I went up top and walked across a net spanning two pillars. It was pretty bouncy. After exiting the tower, I retired for the evening.

I wanted to visit a village while on my trip, so I picked Provins, a medieval village I did little research on. I took the bus to my local station, only to learn the lines were closed. I ended up on a rail replacement bus and eventually reached Gare de l'Est station. There, I observed a pickpocket eye me up, walk towards me, and give up on his endeavours. I arrived at Provins on the "P" line and found myself in a beautiful village. I explored a bit and came across an underground passageway. I heard violins coming from the passageway. Like the sailors going towards the Greek Sirens, I entered this unknown cavern. I found many people in medieval attire in a large tavern, where food was being served. It turned out to be a private function. As I didn't want to break the theme of going into underground spaces, I found another one. I took a tour of a subterranean network. The tour was in French and was probably very educational. As I do not speak French, I learnt nothing. I still do not know what these tunnels were for…

On Sunday, I took a bus to Paris, as I wanted to visit the Louvre. This was a good visit. I managed to see the Mona Lisa and several other great pieces. Due to misremembering a Doctor Who episode, I was failing to find the Van Gogh section. After some googling, I found it was in a different museum. I walked over to Musée d'Orsay and explored a bit. I came across the exhibit. After this, I decided to walk to Notre Dame and Sainte Chapelle. The Sainte-Chapelle was an amazing sight.

I came to finish unpacking my stuff. Overall, a very good trip. Paris is a top city, and Provins is beautiful. Would visit again. The hospitality and friendliness of this country are incredible. The journey back was in first class on Eurostar, the catering was superb.